A Vital Part of Working the AA Program
A Vital Part of Working the AA Program
I am currently doing service at Plymouth Intergroup, as Probation Liaison Officer – this is my second position there, the first being Intergroup Secretary, which I did for 3 years. I didn’t exactly jump for joy when my sponsor suggested I go for any of these positions, but Step One means that I have done it anyway. Service has had a direct influence on my day-to-day life. As well as keeping me sober – without which, I would lose everything anyway – service has also taught me the disciplines I need, which I have been able to use in other areas of my life.
Just one of the many examples of this is my graduating for a university degree. When I think of how defeatist I was (and can be again, if I stopped working the program), it’s almost laughable that I attended my university course for 3 years, turned up to lectures on time and handed in every piece of work according to deadlines. That’s just not me! Again, the disciplines I’ve learned by doing service have been the reason for this. In a structured home group such as mine, things are done in a certain way and punctuality is a must. We don’t have a strong and effective group by accident. And no one can “make” me do anything, so there is no such thing as a “controlling group”. I have to willingly give myself to service and all the other actions of recovery, because my life depends on it. It’s basic Step One. I can’t just pick and choose what I want to do: I’m either doing it, or I’m not. If the GSR asks me to do service at the last minute, the answer has got to be yes. If I say, “No, I can’t be bothered”, then what I’m really saying is: “I don’t need AA anymore: I’m not THAT powerless over alcohol!”
I can’t switch off my powerlessness over alcohol, and I need to be clear on this fact if I want long-term sobriety. If the phone goes and I’m asked to do a 12 Step call, I take it. How dare I not try and pass on what has been freely given to me?
Service has also taught me to get on with other people better, and this has been essential in my current job, for which I have to work as part of a team. And I’ve lived my dreams with the various music projects that I’ve been involved in, since being recovered in Alcoholics Anonymous. I’m not naturally a team player. My natural reaction is to go off in a huff, when things don’t go my way, so doing service in the structured AA home group that I belong to has taught me humility. I’m an arrogant and self-centred alcoholic, drunk or sober. This is hardly a successful combination for living life. Fortunately, I continue to allow myself to be sponsored, and I continue to put in the actions that keep me sober, service being an essential part. Sometimes I get things horribly wrong, and I just have to accept that and move on. The most important thing is to not change the game-plan that has kept me safe for years.
Arash, Road to Recovery Group, Plymouth